Consistency is hard…

I like to start projects. I do! I love to plan them and imagine how good I will be following the plan, and how great it will be when I complete the project. I imagine how it will make me feel: powerful, accomplished, happy!

And this is where most of my project die. Inside my head, without seeing the light of day.

This is, obviously, something I don’t want. I have been trying to fight this for some time now. This inertia that takes hold of me. I think that part of me is afraid of what will happen if my plans succeed. What will happen if someone actually reads this, and enjoys it? What will happen if I get people watching my youtube videos to a point where the channel can be monetized? What will happen if I start some type of shop (etsy, shopiffy, squarespace, wherever) and people actually want to buy things from me? Will I be able to keep up? Will I be able to keep showing up, putting out videos and doing what I think is fun now, continuously? Or will I recede into my shell, and avoid the responsibilities I placed on myself? Will I be able to make this hobby into something that could help me finance some of the large projects I would like to embark on?

Honestly, I don’t know. I think that it is really hard to change. But I will still try.

Therefore I publish this text. And let’s hope for more to come.

And, to any one stumbling upon this blog, Happy New Year!